The first doctor's visit was a humbling and over whelming experience.
I don't usually feel different. I am "out" at work, with all my friends ... heck I even had a 100+ gay wedding with dresses and photographers and a giant cake. Sitting at the Doctors office reminded me that I am in fact "different".
Lots of people get accidentally knocked up in the back seat of a car, while on summer break, or when they miss a pill. But not us... we have to use a sperm bank, doctor and a whole hell of a lot of forms.
So there I was - humbled by the fact that being in the doctors office meant I was in fact different. Then it occurred to me - how hard it must be for straight couple who have been trying for a year to sit in the office seats. How emasculating it must feel for a man to have to use another man's sperm. How stressful it must be for a woman to want a baby so bad and not be able to get pregnant.
The experience gave me a lot more compassion and understanding of things I had never thought of before ... and then ... out came the forms.
It was bad enough to just be there but then he started writing out a to do list.
1. Have blood work drawn for testing
2. Physical exam and pap smear
3. Select donor
4. Fax donor agreement
5. Sign storage agreement
6. Contact lawyer
7. Check for insurance coverage
8. Make counseling appointment
Hold up! What? Make a counseling appointment? That's right folks ... it is required by law to see a counselor at least once before they will allow you to be inseminated.
Needless to say I left feeling completely overwhelmed and drowning in paperwork.
1. Be prepared to fill out lots of forms
2. You will be required to see a counselor
3. Give yourself enough time to complete all the required tasks