Friday, July 30, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Well this past weekend we went up to Michigan for our baby shower with my family. I have to say I was really touched that so many of my family came and celebrated the upcoming arrival of our little bean! Plus we got presents umm YAY!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
1. I have to have a physical including my cholesterol. Explain to me how my cholesterol affects how good of a parent I will be?? And if you think they won't turn me down if I have a high number, you are wrong. A guy I work with was denied being a foster parent to two kids who already lived with him because his cholesterol number was high. He had to go to the Dr., get on Lipitor and reapply a year later. That is just flat out wrong
2. Background check for everyone in the house. Now I get that I need a background check, but get this, everyone who I live with also has to have one. So let's say MJ had some felonies on her record (which she doesn't). I would be denied an adoption because I live with her even though she is the birth mother!?! Say again!!!! ....... Yes that is right, if MJ has a record then I can't adopt because I am putting my adoptive child in danger in my household with its own birth mother. This makes me mad in ways I can't even explain.
I am lucky I have a lawyer because I am pretty sure I would thrown out of court on contempt. Hopefully I will make it through this process in one piece. I just have to keep my eye on the prize - which is the bean.
If you read MJ's blog than you know we have decided to do a home birth. And I have to say for being a worrier, this makes me worry less. For being pragmatic, it actually makes the most logical sense. I am all for preparing for the worst, but why not try for the best first?
Here are the reasons I like the home birth :
1. Hospitals treat you like you are sick and MJ isn't sick; she is pregnant. If a true emergency arises, then we are close to a hospital that can help her.
2. I want MJ to have all the time she needs and not feel rushed. I don't want any nurse saying "she isn't progressing and needs pitocin". If the baby wants to take 24 hours, then there is a reason. And MJ is strong enough to handle it with me as her coach and her team of Midwives.
3. I am very logical and the thought of trying to give birth lying down makes no sense. Your tail bone would get in the way and make it harder, plus you aren't using gravity to help.
4. Who wants to sit still when you are in pain? I think MJ should have the right to walk around, labor in a tub, lie in a bed, sit on an exercise ball etc. Whatever she wants.
5. Who wants to be naked in front of strangers? I feel the most comfortable at home and I thought of walking around while in labor in front of others does not sound like a good time. I would want privacy. I would want quiet, and darkness and calming music. I don't want busy hospital and lights and people treating me like I am a ticking bomb.
6. I have the option to catch my baby. Yes you did read that right. What an amazing opportunity that would be. The first hands to hold her could be mine. We will see how it goes, but having this as an option is amazing.
7. We get at home help and coaching on breast feeding. The midwives will come every day if needed until the bean figures out what's what.
What it really boils down to is this - I want choices. I want our birth to fit into a timeline that works for the baby - not that works for the hospital. I want an attendant there, that I know, the majority of the time, not our Dr showing up for the last 30 minutes. I want to be treated like we are the only patient that day - not one of 100. So because of all that, we are going with a home birth. We will see how it goes, but I am very excited and confidant. I feel like I am empowered and I am excited that our midwife takes more than an hour with us on each visit - not just 7 minutes like our Dr.
When I ask people to tell me some of the best days of their lives, a child's birth is at the top. So I started to think "Why am I dreading what will be one of the best days of my life." Now that we have chosen a home birth, I can hardly wait for the Queen Bean to arrive.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Well we had our consultation on the 29th of June and right away we both felt even more comfortable with the idea of a home birth.
Home 4 Birth is made up of 2 midwives, who take on 6 births every month. They work as a team and only split up if by some off chance two of their patients are in need of their assistance at one time. The also have an apprentice who works with them and if given permission would also attend the birth.
We decided to think about it, but it really didn't take much more thought. It is what we want. I have sent them an email today to officially request to be placed under their care.
We feel confident in their abilities, and know that they put our interests first. We also know that if an issue arises they are experienced in recognizing the severity of the issue and will execute a transfer to a hospital to ensure my safety or the baby's safety.