Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Who wants to be naked in front of strangers?

If you read MJ's blog than you know we have decided to do a home birth. And I have to say for being a worrier, this makes me worry less. For being pragmatic, it actually makes the most logical sense. I am all for preparing for the worst, but why not try for the best first?

Here are the reasons I like the home birth :
1. Hospitals treat you like you are sick and MJ isn't sick; she is pregnant. If a true emergency arises, then we are close to a hospital that can help her.

2. I want MJ to have all the time she needs and not feel rushed. I don't want any nurse saying "she isn't progressing and needs pitocin". If the baby wants to take 24 hours, then there is a reason. And MJ is strong enough to handle it with me as her coach and her team of Midwives.

3. I am very logical and the thought of trying to give birth lying down makes no sense. Your tail bone would get in the way and make it harder, plus you aren't using gravity to help.

4. Who wants to sit still when you are in pain? I think MJ should have the right to walk around, labor in a tub, lie in a bed, sit on an exercise ball etc. Whatever she wants.

5. Who wants to be naked in front of strangers? I feel the most comfortable at home and I thought of walking around while in labor in front of others does not sound like a good time. I would want privacy. I would want quiet, and darkness and calming music. I don't want busy hospital and lights and people treating me like I am a ticking bomb.

6. I have the option to catch my baby. Yes you did read that right. What an amazing opportunity that would be. The first hands to hold her could be mine. We will see how it goes, but having this as an option is amazing.

7. We get at home help and coaching on breast feeding. The midwives will come every day if needed until the bean figures out what's what.

What it really boils down to is this - I want choices. I want our birth to fit into a timeline that works for the baby - not that works for the hospital. I want an attendant there, that I know, the majority of the time, not our Dr showing up for the last 30 minutes. I want to be treated like we are the only patient that day - not one of 100. So because of all that, we are going with a home birth. We will see how it goes, but I am very excited and confidant. I feel like I am empowered and I am excited that our midwife takes more than an hour with us on each visit - not just 7 minutes like our Dr.

When I ask people to tell me some of the best days of their lives, a child's birth is at the top. So I started to think "Why am I dreading what will be one of the best days of my life." Now that we have chosen a home birth, I can hardly wait for the Queen Bean to arrive.


  1. I have to say, I'm insanely jealous. I wanted homebirths with both of mine, and our insurance (military) freaked out and refused to pay ANYTHING, and we couldn't afford it out of pocket.

    This is so awesome! I'm glad you ladies are able to get what YOU feel is right and not what "they" (whoever 'they' are) feel is right.

  2. Followed your post from the BB GLBT boards. Just wanted to share that our son was birthed at home. Although I was very open to doing anything that was needed to keep us both safe and sound, I feel truly blessed that we were able to bring him into world in the manner that we did and into familiar surroundings. I found it very calm and nurturing being in my own space and not having to worry about getting into a car and transferring to a hospital. My partner wasn't able to catch our son because he literally shot out of me (lol!), but she was able to hold him -- skin to skin -- moments after cutting the cord.

    Best of luck with your own home birth plan and congratulations on the impending arrival of your little one.

  3. I was born at home and look how awesome I am... good choice!